Sunday, May 27, 2012

Rejoice and be glad

May 25th was a day.

Not just any day, and it was a day I knew was coming.

May 25th was the day the sheriff sale of my house took place, starting the 6 month countdown of the days the boys and i have left here. I am being told there still is a chance at a short sale during this redemption period I have, so I am working towards that and hoping for the best.

At the same time, it is good to know where I am at and more so how to plan.

The other big event of May 25 is that when I picked Liam up to bring him to daycare, I saw the band on Kim's finger. A few hours later a coworker confirmed my finding by mentioning her relationship update on facebook to "engaged".

I was a little foggy anyways because I stayed out too late Thursday night celebrating a friends birthday, but on a day where I really needed to perform, I was finding myself easily distracted. When I was ready to talk, God brought the right person to me for this conversation

Although I want a deeply connected relationship with a woman, I have been becoming increasingly aware how exactly this time without anybody is a gift to me. It is a gift because it allows me to address the baggage I carry around. It is a gift because I more easily have time to meet with my Creator. It is a gift because it allows me time to mature into somebody that can lead, and lead well.

My friend Jeff reinforced many of these thoughts to me and as we talked hope for a future was bubbling inside me.

There are many destinations on my journey through this life, and the one that I am most excited about is not the day where I get to hold somebody and call her mine and for her to call me hers, but for a time much sooner than that, a time where I have put down my defenses and let myself be known deeply and a time where words, thoughts and actions flow freely from my heart.

I am certainly heading there...

And that is why I can sing "this is the day that the Lord has made, I will rejoice and be glad in it"

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Reading these old posts it is very clear that you were still in love with her