picking up the pieces

i have to start picking up the pieces of my life.  i have waited in limbo for a month, hoping that this is all just a nightmare.

but it is not.

i have lost the one person that i care about more than anything else in the world.  anything else

my hope is not gone though, because my hope is founded in something greater than her or i.

today though, i have to learn to live without her.  i have to fulfill my responsibilities without her.  i have to be a dad but i also have to be a mom.  i have to pay my bills.  i have to set my own schedule.  i have to cook meals. i have to clean.  i have to do laundry.

the challenge is in front of me, like it or not, but i will face this challenge head on, and i will conquer it.

i am becoming the leader of my house that i should have always been, and filling these roles is just a small part of it.