Tears fall

Tonight as snuggle time became prayer time tears fell. 

They fell as each boy uniquely gave thanks for the important things to them. 

They fell as Liam wanted more turns as he listened and agreed with his brothers. 

They fell as I thanked God for each individual personality gifted to me through these little men and the remembrance they are to me of who God is. 

They fell as I was urged to pray for healing for their mothers leg and freedom from the constant pain she endures. 

And they fall now as I humbly realize I am teaching them about the God who redeems, restores, and reconciles and that they are getting it, that they see the truths that God is for us and He wants to make all things new. 

And while tears may fall, my heart is overflowing. 

Scary good

God has answered several prayers of mine recently. 

I mean I get impressions of God speaking info to me often, and God is always faithful to answer the prayer to make my heart soft again and to draw me near to him, but these prayers were different.  At least they seem that way. 

Prayer 1 was when I needed confirmation that an impression was true. It was Easter Sunday, and I was a bit hard hearted. I asked for a sign of confirmation.  The last sermon note that day...it was like God was asking me do you want the fleece on the ground wet and the surrounding ground dry, or the ground wet and the fleece dry.  He had me. Confirmation was given. Prayer answered. 

Also on Easter Sunday, a few rows up, was this guy sitting with his wife. Normally, like every other Sunday, it was always here alone. I though nice, he came for Easter, maybe I missed him at Christmas. But the next week, he was there again, and again today, without his wife who had to take a kid to a soccer match. Today, I was excited. I've been praying since September for this guy to come back to God and to the church.  Prayer answered. 

The other thing that was very clear, this past Friday, after having a really encouraging conversation with my brother Chris I got an impression to call a guy. I texted with him a week ago and knew his family life was crazy busy and it wasn't letting up until June. Simple prayer, God if we are supposed to talk tonight, have him call me. 20 minutes later, I just pulled into my driveway and I get a phone call from, you guessed it, the guy that came to mind. Prayer answered. 

All this is pretty cool things that God is up to, but it has me scared. 

Scared, I tell ya. Uneasy, worried, nervous. 

Why?  Because God has started to burden me with other stuff. Big stuff. A building acquisition, the complete healing of my ex wife's body, a revival of manhood as defined by God in this area. Hope for the journey, a book to be written, and other dreams. 

Bold prayers. 

I am scared because what if I don't have enough faith. 

Here is the beauty I am hanging onto today in the midst if my fear, it is not about me, and it is not done by me. It is God alone.

It is God alone, and that is the way it should be.