for you

I want to fix all your problems.  I do not want you to hurt, ever.  I want to control the circumstances around you to give you a safe environment.  I want you to have all you think you need and want to make you happy.  And I don’t want to fail in this.  I can’t let myself fail in this, so I hold onto everything I can in order to manipulate it and get the outcome that I want to see…

But yet I have failed mightly because I have not given you a place to struggle and grow and become who God has always intended for you to be.

And even in my best wisdom, I would never be able to help you become what God desires for you.  I am not the one that promised to give you hope and a future. (Jeremiah 29:11).  I am not the one that can move mountains without their knowing it (Job 9:5).  I am not the one that can speak to the sun and make it not shine (Job 9:7).  I am not the one that made the constellations (Job 9:9).  Nobody says about me that I perform wonders that cannot be fathomed and miracles that cannot be counted (Job9:10).  Nobody seriously says, if Rob is for us, who can be against us (Romans 8:31).

Over the last 11 years I should have been there to struggle with you and I should have done much less controlling of things that I actually had no business trying to control…and I will still screw up in this I am sure…

I am here today to struggle with you though…I am here today to help bring you closer to our creator…I am here today to love you.